Spring is officially here! It’s been unusually cold and stormy with lots of rain. For me, that’s been a lot to get used to. At least it’s given me time to work on my business. I’m excited for lots of good stuff coming soon, especially my upcoming collaboration with Barb Hubbard – Strategy Toolbox- Coaching and Implementation Lab! Our first session is April 18th, click this link to learn more and register. I hope to see you there!
My Accountability Days program is up and running. If you need set, structured time to get stuff done, please check it out and join us. This group is especially helpful if you’re feeling stuck and need help getting out of “Not this”.
Have you ever sat in a room full of people trying to be social all the while wondering why you’re there? Or dreading an event just looking at it on your calendar? Or you’ve stood at the kitchen sink muttering about having to do the damn dishes AGAIN when you don’t live alone and the dishes aren’t even yours?
Okay, maybe that was just me, but if you’ve felt even a flicker of those emotions or had those thoughts run through your head…You are not alone!
At some point in time, we all hit a moment when we’re done. We can no longer live life the way we’re currently living. We face a crossroads where we need to choose to make a change or wilt away.
This is a “Not this” moment.
I got that term from a Facebook post entitled “Not This” by Elizabeth Gilbert. She wrote, “Most of us, at some point in our lives… will have to face a terrible moment in which we realize that we have somehow ended up in the wrong place…I call this moment of realization: NOT THIS.”
Read it! The post is immensely powerful because we all have had moments in our lives where we’ve screamed “Not this!” and were brave enough to make a change. We may not have always felt brave at that moment or recognized the courage we gathered to make those changes, but it was there.
Looking back, I recognize many “Not this” moments in my life. Each one was pivotal to me becoming the person I am today and each one scared me enough to know there was no going back.
For some people, their “Not this” moment is the impetus they need to create better eating habits or finally release bins of stuff or recognize they can’t say yes to every social event that comes their way. They use their “Not this” moments to start clearing their pebbles and make real lasting change.
“Not this” moments are the starting point. It’s when the decision is made for something better. It’s the trigger, the prompt, that something is wrong and we need to do something different.
These moments look different for everyone. Here’s how they showed up for me…
- As a stress-filled decision to stay or go during a corporate downsizing
- Having a “do we get a divorce” conversation with my husband
- Feeling alone in a crowd of people having the same shallow conversations
- Getting diagnosed with Diabetes
- Realizing that the changes I need start with me and I can’t change anyone, only myself
After each “Not this” moment, I learned to:
- Prioritize events and engagements with people that feel right for me.
- Do the hard soul searching work to uncover the hidden barriers I’d placed between me and success
- Release years of negative thoughts about what I deserved or what I was capable of achieving, in order to make real progress on my goals.
- Focus on my own actions and habits to keep a clean, uncluttered house that feels supportive.
- Shift away from who I used to be and honor the person I am becoming. I am more than a mother, a wife, and a sister. I am someone with my own dreams and desires!
If you’re standing at a crossroads and “Not this” is filling you up, that’s a good thing IMO. It means you’re ready to make a change and that’s always the first step.
Use your “Not this” moment to:
- Gain clarity on what you don’t want so you can get clear on what you do want.
- Prioritize the changes you want to make in your life.
- Make a plan to create small changes in your daily life to reach those priority goals.
- Get clear on WHY you’re making the changes in your life and what you envision for the outcome
Are you ready? I can help!
Clearing Pebbles is the program I created to help you make the small, incremental steps needed to say goodbye to “Not this” and move into the life that’s waiting for you!
Decluttering one area at a time, one project at a time, baby step by baby step, makes visible lasting change and gets you unstuck. My 30 Day Get Started Declutter Challenge focuses on the physical clutter around your home, but breaking down any part of your “Not this” into a project and working through the steps can help you break out of the muck of the moment and get you moving in a new direction.
You DESERVE to have what’s on the other side of “Not This.” You deserve to release the judgment, shame and guilt that’s holding you back so you can feel good in your heart, your mind and your skin. You deserve the feeling of ease, success, and healthy boundaries.
Working through my “Not this” moments, I realized I deserved to love all the events on my calendar. I deserved a clean space. I deserved my success and a life of ease.
YOU deserve all that too!
You don’t have to do it alone.
If you’re ready to make a change, but aren’t sure what to do, reach out and let’s talk!